- LOUISIANA - Recently, my partner and good friend,
Stan Murdoc was committed for a clinic dedicated to rehabilitating
idiots (they prefer not to be called "flaming morons")
who are addicted to reality TV. I was allowed to take a tour
of the facilities, and I decided to write a story about it.
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- How the Addiction Began:
- "At first, it started small," says Stan of his
first signs of addiction. "I taped a couple episodes of
MTV's Real World, I watched Temptation Island a
couple times, things like that. Then I started wanting more.
I started to get these needs for it. I would get up late at night
and watch the same episode of Survivor over and over.
At the worst point, I had taped all 400 episodes of Real World,
and was still not satisfied."
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- Realizing He Was Addicted:
- "When I started selling my crack for more Temptation
Island 2, I knew something had to be done," Stan remembers.
"I committed myself, because I knew I had a problem."
-
- Stan's Therapy:
- In the first stages of his therapy, Stan was forced to watch
the "gay naked guy" (as Stan puts it) from the first
Survivor. He was then made to watch the real world. (No not the
show.) "It made me realize that life is not nearly as dramatic
as on reality TV." They also made him watch someone eat
a rat right next to him. "It was &*%$@# nasty! Even
worse than on TV! I threw up on the spot!"
- In later therapy sessions, Stan would have to watch forms
of TV other than reality TV. "Whenever I wanted to
watch TV, I had to watch things like Days of Our Lives and
Pokemon. The lame acting almost broke me on the spot."
He then had to go 1 week without any TV at all. "I was heard
saying things like 'C'mon, nurse, I need my fix! I'll do anything!
You can't cut me off like this!' It was pathetic. Once the cravings
subsided, I had to do other things for entertainment, like pahrcheesi
and poker."
- In the last stage, he was left alone with a TV, a a TV guide,
and a book for three hours. "I almost broke down and watched
Murder In Small Town X, but I managed to resist. I picked
up the book, and read for three straight hours, without having
the temptation again!"
- After that, they allowed him to get on the internet, but
blocked all sites about Reality TV. "I was surprised that
they allowed me to look at porn, but not survivor."
-
- Aftermath:
- Stan's life has been forever changed by this series of events,
and it has left a permanent scar. "I can't be around people
who watch reality TV anymore. Luckily, Bob thinks it's stupid,
or I would have had to stop being near him. I couldn't have gotten
through this without him, too. He was very supportive and helpful."
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- Conclusion:
- All in all, I can see no benefits in Reality TV whatsoever.
Some people claim that it is a way to relax after work, or they
just watch it on the side, but most people who watch become addicts
for life. Stan's message to the world: "Don't watch Reality
TV, take it from me, it's NOT a good thing! Also, do not submit
to peer pressure, it can get you in big trouble or an institute!"
So that's it folks, from a man who has been there and back.
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