| DENVER, CO- Reverend
Robert Hurd, second cousin to our very own Beufred Beaubouts,
has been possessed by the Virgin Mary. After healing a witch
doctor through the Catholic faith, he was seen standing under
the glowing Virgin Mary. This led many to believe
that "Dr. Bob" has been possessed. He now
speaks Gibberish after being able to speak French, Spanish, and
Italian. We found his restaurant bills after the incident,
and all of them were well over $200! Please note that
he was all alone during all the meals. The Virgin Mary
has compelled him to do many odd actions. Some of
these actions include: assisting suicide, attending wrestling
matches, stealing donations, shooting up holy water, and believing
he can heal people with just faith for all the money they have.
"Instead of calling him Robert Hurd, they should call
him Robert Fraud!" says one anonymous customer. "He
has gypped so many innocent people, he should be kicked to death
by small children!" says another. But there are many satisfied
customers too. Suzie Gallo, a satisfied customer says "He's
so good with patients. He does research for us and he has good
relationships with the hospitals." Chief Reporter,
Beufred Beaubouts, said "Everyone says that he was a good
man before the incident but you know what, he was just damn crazy
all the way around no matter what his friends say." When
interviewed, Reverend Bob's comments were inappropriate for this
article. "I'm still trying to put it out of my mind."
says Beaubouts. This reporter thinks that so many people
have been saved by this man that we should be able to dismiss
a few "odd actions". |
Bob standing under the glowing Virgin
Mary
|